How to Have a One Night Stand and Enjoy It

Sign Up
one night stand etiquette

One night stands are a great way to try new things in the bedroom - without committing to a serious relationship. Whether you’re between relationships, a commitment-phobe, or you fancy a little excitement with someone new now and then - one night stands can be perfect for hitting the spot.

Sometimes the first time we have sex with someone new, it can be awkward - especially if we want them to like us. The beauty of a one night stand is it’s only going to happen once - you can be yourself, let go without embarrassment and bring out your freaky side without worrying about how to look their parents in the eye at a later date.

How to Ask for a One Night Stand with a Stranger

Once you’ve decided a one night stand is right for you, you need to find a single girl or single guy who wants the same. So how do you go about asking for a one night stand with a stranger?

Approaching someone new is always nerve-wracking - but as they say, “if you don’t ask, you don’t get”. Online dating offers the perfect environment to ask something you might not have the confidence to in person - after all; you can’t have a drink thrown over you through a screen.

The truth is, there are plenty of women looking for a one night stand and nothing more - but they don’t want to shout about it. Being discreet is key when approaching a stranger for a one night stand - whether it’s online or in person.

Once someone feels comfortable with you, they will offer you the right signals. Online lookout for flirting, sexual chat or winking and photo exchanges; in person, pay attention if they’re touching you, making eye contact, or asking what your plans are for the rest of the night.

Once you read these signals, be confident in asking your date if they want to meet for the night, or - you’re out already - if they want to join you for a nightcap. A straightforward question, but asked discreetly, will often get you a straightforward answer - so be confident.

Asking for a One Night Stand with Someone You Already Know

Sometimes we meet people online, and whilst we might match, it never goes any further - so how do you get that match from three months ago to become your next one nightstand? There is no problem messaging an old match and to pick up where things left off. Let them know you’ve been busy with other life commitments, but you’re ready to pay a little more attention to your sex life - similarly to asking a stranger, be confident, and ask them what they’re doing tomorrow night.

If you want to ask some you know in RL for a one night stand, things can be more difficult. Having one night stands with friends is often a bad idea because it is hard to go back to “friends” after a sexual relationship. If you’re thinking of having a one night stand with someone you know, ensure that having one night with them is more important to you than a lifetime of friendship.

In general, strangers are the best people to have one-night stand with as there are no confusing feelings the next day. Online dating sites help you find casual relationships with no strings attached, helping you find success one night stands without the drunken complications that come with approaching people in bars.

Rules for a Night with Casual Dating

There are no rules for a night with casual dating or a one night stand. The best thing about a one night stand is - if your partner is up for it - anything goes. The only real rule is, it’s for “one night only”, unless you both decide to let the relationship develop into a booty call or friends with benefits.

Do’s and Don'ts: One Night Stand Etiquette for Beginners

Whilst there are no rules for having a one night stand, there is one-night stand etiquette for beginners to stick to to ensure they make no faux pas.


  • Compliment your partner for the night
  • Be confident and ask what your partner likes
  • Remember, you can change your mind at any point - even if you’re already in bed.
  • Go take an overnight bag (toothbrush, wet wipes, a change of underwear, and a hairbrush! It will transform the “walk of shame”.


  • Stay too long (a one night stand means leaving in the morning, and while you might grab breakfast or lunch, it’s not an excuse for a “couples lazy Sunday”.
  • Don’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with.
  • Don’t be afraid to take the lead.
  • Don’t force post-sex affection - if it happens, cool, if not, you still got what you wanted.

How to Have a Safe One Night Stand

Having sex with strangers will always carry some sort of danger - especially as you’re entering a private space with them, whether it’s your place or theirs. If you’re thinking of having a one night stand with someone new, make sure you tell someone your plans. A housemate, good friend, sibling, or even parent can be sent a simple “I’m heading to a friend for the night, I expect to be home at (expected time tomorrow) - just to let you know, here is my location” and when you arrive at your partners home or hotel, quickly share your location. If you’re heading back to yours, it can often feel a lot safer, but it’s still always best to let someone know.

Having sex with strangers also creates problems with not knowing your new sexual partner’s history. If you’re having casual sex or one night stands, your sexual health should be your priority, and protecting yourself from STIs and pregnancy is an unspoken rule.

What to do the Morning After the Night Before

Every “morning after the night before” is different. Some people want a second round, others a cuddle and a quick shower before leaving. Some partners might even want to pop out for brunch or lunch - but it is important to read your partner and not overstay your welcome. One night stands are called one night stands because they last, just one night.

A Relationship After a One Night Stand; is it Possible?

A recent Business Insider survey found that 30% of long term relationships started with a one night stand. While you might both go into a one night stand wanting only that, sometimes connections are realized, and the relationship might develop. If your one-night stand becomes friends with benefits situation, there is a good chance it could lead to something more serious - if it is what both of you want.

If you want to pick up single men or single women for your next one-night stand, online dating is often the safest and fastest way to hook up with someone new - what are you waiting for? Register at